Thursday, December 18, 2014

Date Club: The Trouble With People #2

If you missed Part I, go --> HERE

I managed to land myself into the funny, exciting, confusing, and absolutely creepy world of dating.

This propelled me to start a short series [writing and radio interviews] about relationships [from all perspectives] because quite frankly, a lot of people seem to be EXTREMELY confused about the differences between dating, relationships, love, like, attraction, friendship, passion, spark, sex, making love, long-term, short-term and just for fun.

After reading numerous articles by so called "relationship gurus" advising men and women to solely act in favor of the other gender or partner, rather than WITH one another or for self, I found such advice not applicable to reality whatsoever.

Most disturbing is that people pay strict attention to "relationship gurus" as well as pay hard earned money for advice that is as general as horoscopes in the newspaper.

With that being said, I invite you to look through my eyes and experience the world of dating, online and off.

Come on, I promise it will be more than interesting. Some of this stuff is downright hysterical, some of it is painful truth, a lot of it is purely horrifying, some of it is fun and most of it is 100% absolute nonsense.

Thus, I hereby dub this experience, "Date Club" after one of my favorite movies.

First rule of date club:

Do not take anything serious in date club.

The first order of business is an online profile.

How hard is it to take a non insane photo of yourself and post it online?

One would think this is an easy task.

I have a few DEFINITE PHOTO DONT'S:

- selfies in public toilets or any toilet, anywhere, ever

- on a tractor, with a shotgun, in the wild

- trying to look sexy, ending up with a "serial rapist" look

- the "I was just released from prison, again" look

- with a bunch of small children = weirdo pedophile

- with women or men hanging all over you

- with people marked out, whited out, or cut out

- all curled up in bed causing you to look [psychotic?]

- with your head cut off showing ONLY your body

- you and your friends

- you in a club, wasted, holding up a drink with your friends

- you and your parent!

- naked, walking in fields of wheat

- just between your legs with women's undies on when you
are a male seeking a female

- just your eyes, up close, real close, TOO close

[See line #3]

-with sunglasses on [in.every.single.photo]

-dressed like Pirates of the Caribbean [in.every.single photo]

-just your chest, muscles, torso, breasts, butt, body parts

-ONLY working out

-doing some Evil Knievel stunt

-in your work attire

[like right before surgery, by trays of sharp instruments]

-depressed, sad, not smiling [might need psychotherapy]

-with a ton of people [hmm, I wonder which one you are?]

-with makeup on [blush, eyeliner, the whole nine] when
you are a man seeking a woman

-just your tattoos

-on your bike, in your sports car, on your yacht [I get it]

-dancing, anywhere, especially disco

-drunk, and/or drugged

-teeth would be nice . . .
-naked torso with a crucifix hanging from your neck
-with your guitar on your couch [in. every.single.photo]
-did I mention no Axl Rose or Poison attire?

Please. Just be you and if that is you, good luck finding the
alternate you . . .

These are just a few and there is, oh, so much more . . .

I need to talk about user names . . .

Address what NOT to say on first contact . . .
The actual date . . .
Phone calls . . .
Texts . . .

Stay tuned for Series #3, "The Trouble With People" with more realistic advice, from direct experience, and live interviews showing the male perspective vs. the female perspective.

There are awesome people to be found and lasting relations in all kinds of fashions. Thus far, I have had all kinds of experiences and they are way too good to keep to myself.

In everything, be careful, have fun, be nice and be clear about why you are REALLY seeking out anyone. That is, if you even know why yourself.

Proper communication is the key people!

First rule of date club:

Do not take anything serious in date club.

Wednesday, December 17, 2014

mouths, silenced, stitched, shut [For Peshawar]

Photo © Wall Street Journal/Associated Press

the faces of
children
shame
innocent
children

blood in the streets
of
the faces
of children
muddied
hardened

weeping tears
like willow trees in Spring

mouths
silenced
stitched
shut
like sewing needles
stuck
harshly
into skin, soft
like bullets
flying
a ricochet
hitting
soft
matter

drawing blood
and more blood
and blood of lives
lost

the present
vomited by forefathers
from past
repeated
set to
rewind
constant

Oh, the innocents,
their dear souls wander
lost and weary
beneath starshine
and the world does not weep
mankind does not weep
the children weep
My God
the pooling of the blood
of the hearts
snuffed out
dead
cold
lying like
fish out of
water
eyes bulging
bloated
on fire
ablaze

they watched
as those they loved
were murdered
they stared
as bodies burned
they stood like statues
as they were
questioned
attacked
harassed

the innocents
the children
the nation of children
blown out
like candle wicks

the faces of
children

shame
innocent
children

blood in the streets
of the faces

of children

mouths
silenced
stitched
shut

© Susan Marie

© Hasan Javad Chatha for speaking these words to me:

"Our government is hungry for our blood. Blood of the nation of the children. Shame."

Sunday, December 14, 2014

Behavior, Accountability and Social Media [1/2 Hour Radio Interview]

On CNN International HERE
ON WGRZ CH. 2 News HERE

Technology is a powerful tool created to utilize proper and quick communication. The history of the internet began in the 1950's with the creation of electronic computers. In the 1990's, there was a rise in computer use due to instant messaging, email, and the World Wide Web.

In our present societies, social media has turned into a "psychological dumping ground" where people often use technology to complain without action.

The internet is a wondrous place where global connections are made, friendships formed and causes are implemented in order to create a better world for all of us.

The internet is also a frightening arena where others use it to abuse, control, rant, and attack individuals who are attempting to connect to the world and each other, on a larger scale.

In this half hour radio interview with Ruthann Amarteifio of Air Amarteifio Radio, we discuss issues such as Ferguson, reactions of people from different classes, accountability for actions, behavior, responsibility, respect, and dignity.

You can listen to the discussion by clicking this link: "Behavior, Accountability and Social Media"

Social media is used for various purposes. Everyone has a right to be online. Everyone has a right to freedom of speech. This is not about rights. This is about holding oneself accountable for behaviors, actions and words.

We exist in a world of blame. Blaming institutions, government, media, races, ethnicity, cultures, nations, and faiths.

Without action, blaming is nothing more than complaining.

"It is one thing to think a black-hearted thought. It is another thing to speak a black-hearted thought in front of others. It is an entirely different issue when that black -hearted thought is posted online." - Susan Marie

Tuesday, December 2, 2014

The Trouble With People

Men say women are difficult and vice versa. Truth is, people are difficult. There is no magic "soul mate fairy" that comes riding on a gold stallion with wings to deliver in your lap the perfect person just so you can be happy.

It takes work. It takes two people to constantly give. Each has to work to be good, loving, kind, communicative, supportive, caring people. It takes self-control not to flip out on another when you are angered. It takes self-awareness to recognize what you need to work on inside your own self to be a great partner and it takes self-respect to not allow yourself to be abused.

My point is life is about finding people you can tolerate, and those who can tolerate you. Find people that are different than you are so you learn and grow, as well as those who are the same as you are in order to feel camaraderie, and find people who act out of a place of love and most importantly, self-love.

There is no such thing as perfection in humans. We are fallible creatures. We are made this way for a purpose. We are meant to make mistakes and meant to succeed and learn from both. By doing so, we pass that knowledge on.

Seek the simple. Seek those who view the world with open eyes, past human faults, past innocent ingrained beliefs and ideals, and directly into the soul for that is where breath is and breath sustains life.

I wonder when I will cease seeing into souls and stare at the world with blinders on?

Hopefully, never.

Alas, this is the path of a seeker. It is one filled with immense beauty and insufferable pain.

Saturday, November 15, 2014

Thoughts While Sleepwalking

Monday, November 10, 2014

Only Human

Human. Now there is an interesting definition.

Being "human" [according to Merriam-Webster] means "a human being, a person as distinguished from an animal or an alien. Susceptible to or representative of the sympathies and frailties of human nature."

In our world, being "human" has taken on an entirely different meaning.

All ranges of emotion from love to happiness to sadness to frustration to anger to darkness to bliss are experienced by humans. Somewhere along the lines, the term "human" has been associated with being "perfect." Perfect attitude, hair, skin, nails, clothes, body, education, family, career, skills, life, travel, adventure, love, and pretty much everything that most humans definitely are not.

Many times in life we over think. Our minds are powerful tools, ones we have yet to fully study and understand. Some days you may feel perfectly in tune with all of your choices and surroundings only to be feeling outcast, outspoken, rude, pitiful and eventually, self-deprecating. I know I am not the only one who goes through this. If you don't, then you are lying, or quite possibly, not "human."

Although such phases do not last long, for me, thankfully, they are unsettling because when you over think, you disallow your instinct to be in control, you tend to become off balance that spirals your rational thought along with your own energy, into massive loops of confusion. You may not be confusing to others, or maybe you are, I can only speak for myself, however, the most important aspect of being off balance is in regards to how you feel about yourself.

When off balance, I tend to react to things I normally ignore and get upset over menial things. This is typically not the "me" of today so I search:

"Why do I feel this way? What caused me to start thinking like this? Why am I feeling out of control?"

Ask yourself, you have all of your answers.

One beautiful aspect of existence and having people put by us for various reasons is that during such times, often without saying a word, some without ever meeting me, sense that something clearly is "not right" simply by reading deeper into my words, my energy, my response and my actions.

As human beings we all wish to be acknowledged, loved and recognized and that is not an egotistical thing, it is a basic need.

Rational and healthy communication is crucial.

It absolutely infuriates me [there I go being "human" again] when there is improper communication because this starts a chain reaction of misunderstanding that leads to "what if" negative self talk and thinking. In turn, eventually, a guilt ridden, self-loathing [for those of us who are "human'] after effect. This is absolutely foolish when you think about it.

[Think for a moment, really, this is not meant to be deep.]

What I learn from being allowed to be myself is that I need to look inside of me every day and not blame another person for the way I feel. After all, it is my own fault feeling as I do no matter what another said to me, how one treated me, or the actions of another human being towards me.

I am in control of myself and am responsible and accountable for my behavior.

I ask myself:

"Why do you feel this way? What caused you to start thinking like this? Why do you feel out of control?"

And guess what? I answer me.

*smile*

Yet without the guidance of those who are reading this and reach out in various ways to acknowledge me, as a fellow human being, I may not arrive so quickly to a conclusion. I may ridiculously crucify myself for no apparent reason other than I choose to.

I was sitting on my couch watching a movie with my son, William, he is 15 years old and I looked at him, I mean I really looked at who he is and I asked him to please give me a hug. The smile on his face was so wide that I began to smile too. He gladly and lovingly hugged me with all of his might and we did not let go, not just yet. I told him that without him in my life that my life would be horrible and I mean that, wholeheartedly.

Hugging my son was touching the divine.

You see, children are insightful and full of unconditional love, gifts we tend to lose as we grow older. In my own child, I felt bright, magnificent light that illuminated me, and I wondered did he also feel that from me?

At that moment, I realized my purpose, regardless of what interests me, what my career is or is not, and who is or is not in my life.

What mattered and does matter was right there with my son. In seconds, every single confusing thought disappeared.

That is the beauty of love. The divine essence of existence.

The fact that we are placed here for various reasons and most times, they are quite simple. We make them complicated.

I realized how blessed I were then, although I have always been aware, yet sometimes we forget in the busy-ness of life. Then everything around me was a gift, the sunshine, nature, my home, my work, my friends, my family, the fact that my limbs work and that I have the means to utilize technology to talk to all of you right now.

For today [and every day] I suggest something extremely simple.

Do this right now.

Look around you and find your divine. It exists.

You just may have your eyes closed at the moment.

So, take the time to work through whatever you are dealing with, just don't stay there.

And always, simply, be human.

Friday, November 7, 2014

Literary Withdrawal: Death of a Book

Published on --> Rebelle Society

I sit in the dark quiet of my sanctuary, the place I come to write, and am overcome by a stabbing inherent fear that books, like many of its authors, shall one day become extinct.

This revelation came to me because I was forced to purchase a tape cassette recorder to listen to a tape, and as I held it in my hand, found myself thinking: I cannot believe I found one to buy.

Think of LP’s. (Oh, how I miss LP’s.) There truly is nothing like an album. Artwork, like tattoos, scrolled across the flaps of the cover and on the inside. That’s when the band invited You inside of Their minds for an hour or two.

(Then I wondered if I purchased a turntable, would I be able to find a needle to set beneath the arm?)

Thank goodness for eBay, garage sales and used bookstores.

You must take pride in being the owner of a used bookstore. A secret society where members peruse old wooden shelving like mad Norsemen, pillaging layers of books, blowing cobwebs from dusty covers, uncovering a treasure or two.

A book is the fruit of self. Knowledge unsurpassed. Everything I have learned has come mainly from books.

Don’t get me wrong. I adore mainstream bookstores. As a rule, I live in them.

Soak myself up in an overstuffed chair, an Italian Soda by my side, a stack of books at my feet, music I have never heard before playing overhead as I delve into Welsh Heritage, Kool-Aid Acid Trips, Nature, Photography, Art and Poetry.

When entering a bookstore, I bypass the front tables streamed with discounts and deals. New authors with their third book published about the exact same things they said in the first one. I head straight to the back, where the literature is hiding.

You can always tell they attempt to hide it. Ask someone working there exactly where the Lit section is and they point you toward… someplace… over… there.

(In reality, they have no idea what Literature is.)

Poetry is the second section I visit, then on to biographies, music, art, photography, and lastly, the horribly sad cart where tattered books lie that nobody wants. The cart of misfits. It is here I always find a volume to keep. Maybe because I, myself, am a misfit and that’s okay. I like being different.

I am surrounded by books. They are best friends to me. A book is life itself breathing inside, waiting for you to discover an entirely new world created by another’s psyche.

How truly fascinating.

An old book possesses something entirely different. They are my favorites to own. I often wonder how many people cried, felt happiness, pain, grief, love, enlightenment from handling this book now in my possession.

The corners are tattered a bit, sure, but this gives it persona. It tells you it doesn’t fuck around, man, and it is meant to be read because it has been read.

Now it’s your turn to ride that steep climb up the first hill of a coaster.

Get ready, the turn is coming; you can feel it now, can’t you?

The existential drop of your belly as you lift from your seat and remain airborne for a millisecond that lasts a lifetime, just to be dropped straight downhill into an inferno that brings you around dark corners, through forests, screaming wild and flipping pages as night turns into day.

This causes me to think of not only the books, but the writers I pay homage to. Where have they all gone?

Why is it that they are noticed after their death, after their struggle, after their entire lives have been a complete and utter hell interspersed with momentary lapses of euphoric bliss?

I use the word homage well, because they are all quite stone cold dead.

(Ahh, but not in the pages. Within the pages, they survive. This is their gift, the gift of any writer to the reader. Regeneration by pure esoteric thought.)

I think of Hemingway… poor Papa. No longer could he write, he could not think after they strapped his brilliance to the electro shocks and stripped him of his gift. It is no wonder he chose solace with one of his prized shotguns.

Kerouac. The thing with Jack is he saw so much fucking beauty, traveled so far, ran with bums, slept in alleys, and walked in freezing temperatures in order to feel life in his veins as his own blood. Jack set out on what he meant to do.

Jack had a purpose, and when it was met, he was done.

Tired.

Down.

Jack was beat.

I could talk for hours on authors gone home, yet fear boring you right out of your mind.

Besides, you really should be reading something of worth. Lawrence Ferlinghetti must be lonely.

“The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn, like fabulous yellow Roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars.”

~ Jack Kerouac, On the Road

Video

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lB-CvM2U6KY

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Late Autumn, Western New York

The other day, we were blessed with fantastic, beautiful weather. I watched the trees, as they lost their leaves, blanketing the grass as the wind whipped wildly.

I thought to myself: This moment is not going to last.

I went outside and on my back, lay down upon the grass beneath the trees and watched the leaves fall onto and all around me.

It was wondrous.

This is Mother Nature, this is the universe,

speaking, to me.

I made two videos from this and took a few shots:

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10152376217156373&set=ms.c.eJxlzEEKACAMA8EfSdNi0v7~%3BY~_JN4nVYFoGdJSaEzVItPCIT9iczLkwX0c~%3BR8HO40BsBLllXDkpsJ3k~-.bps.a.10152252691586373.1073741843.524071372&type=1&theater

1st video features John Ward performing

"Sealliadh [The Seer]"

https://john-ward.bandcamp.com/track/sealliadh-the-seer

2nd video features Tom Callahan, performing "Long Black Veil" from his CD "Irish American."

http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/tomcallahan

Enjoy!

Please check out the artists work on the linked websites.

Check out my channel.

Always something interesting going on there.

Peace.

Sue

Friday, October 24, 2014

Early October : Buffalo New York

Here are two videos I made showcasing early October [Autumn] in Western New York, Cazenovia Park in Buffalo, New York.

The videos feature music by a local band "I Was The Scarecrow"

You can listen to their music here :
http://iwasthescarecrow.bandcamp.com/https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7WocXRODPyQ

Check out the videos below!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7WocXRODPyQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1o7dLr0SX2k

Enjoy!

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

"Heal Kashmir" [Inequality: Blog Action Day 2014]

Every year since 2007, thousands of bloggers have come together for one day to talk about one important issue, like Poverty, Climate Change and Human Rights.

2014 focuses on the rising issue of Inequality.

Kashmir

Since September 3, 2014, destructive monsoon floods have claimed hundreds of lives both in the Indian and Pakistani-administered regions of Kashmir.

The floods left hospitals struggling with numerous people brought in for treatment of waterborne diseases. Medical centers in the flood-hit areas are in dire need of basic supplies and medicine. Hundreds of thousands of people in both parts of Kashmir have been forced out of their homes in the flood-hit areas.

While relief efforts globally and from government entities has been frightfully slow, the strength and independence of the people of Kashmir has once again, risen in times of great adversity.

The above photo, taken 09/08/14 by Ieshan Wani, depicts Budshah bridge where new born babies are being carried in a basket tied with electric wires on the back of a man. The other person was carrying an oxygen cylinder to keep them alive, after they managed to move them from an inundated hospital in Srinagar to JLMN hospital.